On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
