Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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