I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize