She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
