i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
