i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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