coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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