If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
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