the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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