I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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