(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
