Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I am one with the molecules
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize