Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
