I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
