If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
