You work out of a Hotel?
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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