I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
