You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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