One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
