She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
