just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
