the new term for farting is butt boxing.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
