My room smells like vodka and shame
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
This is classic penis vs brain.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
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