You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
