her vagina looked like bernie madoff
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
