i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
