dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
