Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
