the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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