Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize