Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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