p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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