just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Small penises have feelings too.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
