Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
