either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
