You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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