Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
