dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
