Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
