your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
oh god the rape fog is back!
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
