Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
