We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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