so explain again why im purple
no
another moral hangover. fuck.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
