How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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