He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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