i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
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