its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize