What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
