I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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