It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Randomize
