Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I just got carded by a ten year old.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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